We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Randomize
