I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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