I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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