Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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