Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize