it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
