turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
