Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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