wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
