i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
