if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
