I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Randomize