dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
