I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
