Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
