are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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