also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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