dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
