My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
