Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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