I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize