I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
