he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
