Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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