I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
