Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
