I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
You can't motorboat a personality
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Randomize
