chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
accomplished twins. life is a go
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
