Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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