I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
