Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
