I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
