Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
