so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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