"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
