My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
