I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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