grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
