Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
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