I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
