I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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