You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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