The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
