I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
