Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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