Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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