I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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