having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
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