Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I have fence marks all over my body
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Randomize
