we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
